Emotions are a part of our human makeup. However, lack of emotional balance can easily lead to regret. Fortunately for us, we have the ability to control our emotions with practice. Consider the following seven tools that each of us have at our disposal:
1. The pregnant pause.
Create a habit of mindful speaking by simply taking a moment to stop and think before you act or speak. This is especially helpful in a situation where our emotions run high, because it can prevent you from saying or doing something you’ll later regret. A common example is to count to 5 before sharing a response.
2. Dial it back.
Train yourself to notice when your voice volume is elevating. If the receiver points this out to you, resist the urge to yell back. Instead, take a pregnant pause and bring your voice down.
3. Focus to understand.
Remove any desires to focus on what you want to say next. Focus listening carefully and understanding their problem. Focus on understanding how they feel and empathizing with their emotions.
4. Practice silence.
When the person you are communicating with is in a highly emotional state, it’s usually helpful to hit the mute button on yourself. In this type of situation, sharing your point of view won’t really help the situation at that time. Hold on to your thoughts and share them at a later time.
5. Reflect.
Emotionally charged discussions are often rooted in deep-seated issues. If you have chosen to refrain from sharing for a later time, remember to do just that. If you don’t find the time to discuss the issues when emotions are calm, likely the issues will spring up again, and again. Revisit the conversation when all parties have had a chance to cool off.
6. Consider the future.
Sometimes emotions can cloud your judgment; think about how your current emotional decision will affect you 2 years, 5 years, and 10 years down the line. The answers to each scenario can help you make sound decisions that you are proud of.
Can you think of other strategies that can keep your emotional responses at bay? Comment below and share your ideas.